Alone on Valentine’s Day?

February 20, 2018

Loneliness is a common emotion, albeit an unpleasant one. Although many factors can cause a feeling of loneliness, it is most commonly attributed to the simple state of being alone or isolated, especially for prolonged periods of time. The feeling may also be amplified when someone finds themselves alone at times which people generally spend together, such as Christmas or Valentine’s day. Sounds sad, doesn’t it? Being alone on Valentine’s day? Well, it doesn’t have to be.

People react to loneliness in different ways, some healthy and some not. Many people are used to dealing with unpleasant emotions through use of drugs and alcohol. Drinking oneself to a stupor due to being alone on Valentine’s day would not however, solve anyone’s loneliness. There is evidence to the contrary. The time can be better spent with activities that may benefit from such a quiet situation. One could read, write, or even plan. Recognizing the situation as it happens is important, as it gives us the chance to pause and reflect on how to utilize our time to better endure any unpleasant emotions caused by this situation.

Time management would be the baseline skill here, however there is also another factor. Having negative emotions and/or stress could impact one’s skill to manage time, therefore, emotional regulation is quite crucial. One might blame, and may even be resentful; however, that does not support solution-focused thinking. Loneliness is felt by most, if not all people. It is a real feeling and when it becomes your personal reality, the focus should be on how to deal with it. You have the ability to get through this in a healthy way, ultimately growing as an individual.

The important thing is not to feed the negative feelings. Feeling lonely on Valentine’s day, if one was to simply do nothing but sulk, it would only prolong the unpleasant emotions. A positive mindset is crucial. Positive thoughts will combat loneliness, while negative ones will prolong it. Remember, loneliness can sink in so deep, that one may still feel its effects even when surrounded by people. You don’t have to be alone to feel lonely. Most importantly, you are not alone in feeling alone. If no one is around today, someone may be around tomorrow. Utilize today in a productive way. Other people will never disappear forever. We will always be here for each other. We need each other; however, the person we need the most to make everything in life happen, is ourselves. Love yourself. You deserve it.

“Loneliness is not only felt by fools” -Dave Mustaine

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